Dreams in Dusk: Living Without Tomorrow

As the sun sinks beneath the horizon, painting the evening sky with soft hues, the gentle waves sway in harmony with the whispers of the salty breeze. Memories flutter through my mind like seagulls. A past with regrets and a hopeless future is weighing the present with mixed emotions. I ask myself, “Meera, What’s happening in your life? You are surviving against the harsh reality and hope to do better in the future. But, What if there is no tomorrow?”

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Throughout all these years, my life has been consumed by studying and working, with my aspirations for tomorrow constantly put off. In the process, I found myself neither realizing my dreams nor finding contentment. A sense of self-loathing grew within me as I began to measure my worth against the success of others, leading to a deepening pit of despair. Amidst it all, inner peace remained elusive, leaving me yearning for a tranquility I could not grasp.

Looking back, I realize I’ve been trying so hard to be someone I’m not. I’ve always feared that if I just stayed true to myself, I’d fall behind others. But deep down, I know I want to be unique, to be me. Yet, I’ve been running this race with false legs, just to avoid feeling lonely. It’s not about society’s rules, it’s about my fear of being judged or ignored. I’ve wanted to make my family proud, but I’ve been following others instead of listening to my own heart. I’ve worked tirelessly to keep up with everyone else’s success, forgetting to nurture my own passions along the way.

The advice from family and friends didn’t always fit. The path they set often felt like walking on thorns, draining my energy as I struggled just to survive. Sometimes, I felt like giving up, my body and mind exhausted from the effort. Despite it all, I pushed myself to keep moving forward, even when every step felt unbearable. Living a life that wasn’t true to myself only made each breath heavier. I dreamed of pursuing my passions alongside my career, but the lack of time and money held me back. When my dreams clashed with reality, it felt like a constant battle, making it hard to find peace within.

Life feels like a fantasy now, with my mind lost in dreams of living out my own aspirations. But I worry if these dreams will forever remain just that—dreams. A nagging question keeps me up at night: “What if chasing my dreams doesn’t lead to a stable life, and I’m left regretting while others thrive?” I can’t help but envy successful figures, whose passions lead to great success and fulfillment.

There’s this myth that if you pour your heart into your work, everything you want will come to you. But is it really true? If I were to leave the safety of a big ship and venture into a smaller boat, would I still reach my destination unscathed? The answer probably depends on a lot of factors—like the environment, how far I need to go, and most importantly, my willingness to keep trying even after setbacks.

What if I dared to take the road less traveled? Would it lead me to happiness? It’s a question that tugs at my heartstrings, beckoning me to explore the unknown and embrace the possibilities that lie beyond the familiar path.

Whether we like it or not, the world revolves around money. It’s a reality I can’t escape. I have to work to make a living, there’s no way around it. It would be amazing if my dreams alone could provide for me, but if they don’t, there’s no one to blame.

Living by society’s standards often means making compromises, and then suddenly, something like COVID-19 comes along. It doesn’t care about the kind of life I’ve lived; it just does what it does. I could end up dying without even knowing why. And even if I pleaded with it, begging for more time to live my life to the fullest, it wouldn’t listen. No matter what I do, I will eventually die. So, what’s the point of putting off my dreams for later? Unless I want to end up regretting and questioning whether my life was truly worth living.

My life is fragile, vulnerable to even the slightest threat, like an invisible virus that could take it away in an instant. How can I keep putting off my dreams for tomorrow when I don’t even know if I’ll be here? What if the world were to end tomorrow? If it did, I’d rather everything vanish in a blink, unlike in Avengers Infinity War and COVID-19, which steals lives and leaves behind a wake of suffering for those left behind.

Why worry about tomorrow when I can immerse myself in the beauty of the present moment, finding joy in everything I do? I know what brings me happiness, and my mind is filled with solutions for any challenges that may arise. All I need is the courage to embrace myself and move forward fearlessly. My life is precious, deserving of love and self-care just like any other. I refuse to measure my success against others’, finding fulfillment in my own unique interests.

Society’s expectations hold no sway over me; I am the one responsible for my own well-being. In this vast universe, I was born to live authentically and happily, following my own path rather than conforming to societal norms. I’ll live peacefully, unencumbered by concerns for others or anything else, enjoying the freedom to live as I please, just like any other creature in this world. After all, why not live each day as if there were no tomorrow?

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I can’t promise that my thoughts will remain unchanged once I leave this place. However, this time of self-reflection and introspection has bolstered my confidence. I hope to hold onto this newfound sense of self-assurance and live a fulfilling life. The serene beauty of this sunset has stirred up numerous emotions within me, and I long to experience it again and again. Being in nature always brings solace to the mind.

Living as if there’s no tomorrow brings about a state of contentment and beauty, where every moment is cherished and lived fully.

Credits: Images are created by using Microsoft Copilot